April 1, 2006 Time for a short journal before work. I've been home alone all weekend and done nothing, oh well. I had court on Friday morning for my accident. The charge was dropped and everything was dismissed. I'm glad everything went as smoothly as it did. This is a picture of how my car sits as of right now: (link removed) It's moving right along haha. Also, here is a link to the pictures I took in Arizona over spring break, sorry its been so long since I've posted the link: (link removed) There are also new pictures of myself on purevolume along with a new blog so check that out if you get the chance. Hopefully I'll get around to updating my music site with the pictures soon. Thanks for the email(s) that I have been getting in regards to these journal entries. It really does mean a lot to hear from you and talk with you. I'm glad God is using my journals as a way for me to share things with people. It is a great opportunity. So I got around to watching "Inside Man" last night. It was a great movie, but I think it's one of those movies that you have to watch a few times before you catch everything that's going on. I bought a new backpack last night too, I'm such a nerd. But I don't care, I like it. My day today consisted of a big breakfast, watching the original "Psycho" horror movie, and then walking around my neighborhood for about an hour. It's a beautiful day out! I have to learn to stop saying "it could be worse". It has sort of become my new phrase. Well that's all for today, sorry nothing deep or heartfelt haha. I hope everyone is doing well. This random song happens to be playing in the background that I like the lyrics to, so that's what I will post. "To Trixie and Reptile, Thanks for Everything" by Chiodos This is it, our one chance to make things right Post love affliction Our hearts nightmares won't let this happen again Name the last time I wrote about something other than you I'll keep dreaming Not another word sweetheart Nothing is perfect, but this has to be someday So I'll keep dreaming We have to be someday When I'm the reflection in her sun bright eye Knees go weak, and lips quiver The split second before they meet If you believed what you felt you would be in love If you believed what you felt you would be in love If we believe.. "Let the words of my mouth, and the meditation of my heart, be acceptable in they sight, O Lord, my strength and my redeemer." -Psalms 19:14 April 2, 2006 "Be who you are and say what you feel, because those who mind don't matter and those who matter don't mind." -Dr. Seuss I love this quote. It's definitely one of my favorites. I get a lot out of it. To me it means be who you are and don't be affected by the opinions and thoughts of other people. It isn't what is important. I wish more people could realize this. So many people's lives are driven by the fear of man. People need to take a step back and learn that not everything is as important as they think. Maybe it's why so many people are stressing out these days and it is the "age of anxiety". I especially see this at work (I work in a restaurant) when everyone is running around with their heads cut off worrying about this or that. I just feel like everything would run so much smoother if they just don't let things get to them as much. I'm beginning to strongly dislike the restaurant business. I hate to stereotype restaurant employees, and I'm not sure how many of you have seen the movie "The Waiting", but that pretty much lays it out. All of their lives are so far out of whack they have lost all sense of what is important and what is not. Oh well. I've been thinking a lot recently about people who are "living in the present". In a way, I totally agree. You shouldn't dwell in the past and worry about the future. But in another way, you kind of have to consider the past and keep the future not too far out of sight in order to not lose your sense of what is going on in the present. I don't think we should try to live in the past, but we certainly can learn from it and not forget it. And we should definitely think about what we are doing in the present, so we don't put our future in a place we don't want it to lead. It's a tough argument for me. I guess I'm against "living in the moment". Maybe its just spontaneity? Maybe it's legit. Only time will tell. I finished Jimmy's new website about a week ago, but I don't think I posted the link. So go check it out at www.toosorryforapologies.com. It's kind of girly and colorful like a little girl's bedroom… but it's exactly what he wanted. Bible study this week was really good, I'm sure I will write about it soon. Everyone should go listen to Explosions in the Sky. They are an instrumental passionate band. Also, Straylight Run. I had forgotten how much I liked this band until I started listening to them recently again. I didn't go to sleep last night until 4:30. I had some friends over just talking and we had some Cookout. It was great. I've really been smacked in the face this week with the power of prayer. It's amazing how prayer works. I also watched Pride and Prejudice last night. As much as I didn't think I would enjoy it, it was a very well put together movie. I'll leave this post a lot of quotes that I enjoy. Everyone needs to go watch the movie "Dead Poet's Society". It is probably one of my favorite movies now. It actually in a way reminds me of my human values and meaning class. Anyways, here are the quotes: "We don't read and write poetry because it's cute. We read and write poetry because we are members of the human race. And the human race is filled with passion. And medicine, law, business, engineering, these are noble pursuits and necessary to sustain life. But poetry, beauty, romance, love, these are what we stay alive for. To quote from Whitman, 'O me! O life!... of the questions of these recurring; of the endless trains of the faithless--of cities filled with the foolish; what good amid these, O me, O life? Answer. That you are here - that life exists, and identity; that the powerful play goes on and you may contribute a verse.' That the powerful play goes on and you may contribute a verse. What will your verse be?" "I went to the woods because I wanted to live deliberately, I wanted to live deep and suck out all the marrow of life, to put to rout all that was not life and not when I had come to die Discover that I had not lived." - Henry David Thoreau "But only in their dreams can men be truly free. It was always thus and always thus will be." "Carpe Diem! Seize the day. Make your lives extraordinary." "Two roads diverged in the wood and I, I took the one less traveled by, and that has made all the difference." -Robert Frost "There is a time for daring and a time for caution. A wise man knows which is called for." "I sound my barbaric YAWP over the rooftops of the world" -Walt Whitman "Savor words and language. No matter what anybody tells you...words and ideas can change the world." "You must strive to find your own voice, because the longer you wait to begin, the less likely you are to find it at all." "Gather ye rosebuds while ye may, Old Time is still a-flying; And this same flower that smiles today, To-morrow will be dying. " -Robert Herrick April 3, 2006 "If a man hasn't discovered something he will die for, he isn't fit to live." -Martin Luther King Jr. Good quote to think about... Anyway, I failed another math test today. That subject makes no sense at all and I never see any connection to the real world outside of the classroom. Oh well. Today I slept in till 12:00. Not because I was tired or lazy… but because there was a thunderstorm that started early morning that woke me up, and I laid there and listened for hours. It reminded me of the greatness of the God that is up there. Sometimes I think we forget it. "Have you ever given orders to the morning?" -Job 38:12 "Have you seen the gates of the shadow of death? Have you comprehended the vast expanses of the earth?" -Job 38:17-18 "Do you send the lightning bolts on their way? Do they report to you, ‘Here we are'?" -Job 38:35 God was speaking to Job in these passages. I think we often forget the holiness, the righteousness, glory and splendor of the God we serve. We need to learn how to fear the Lord and not people. Can you remember the times in your life when you said, "God is God - I submit to his will"? At those times other people have no power to manipulate pressure, or control us. (taken from "When People are Big, and God is Small"). All of the powerful and amazing things about God we can never be able to fathom. We can never imagine what Heaven is like, what Hell is like, or when the beginning of time was. God is holy. We are not. We will never be able to understand things on God's level. "Such awe attracts you to God; it does not repel or leave you feeling shame. It makes you want to come to him and know him. When the fear of the Lord matures in you, Christ becomes irresistible. Do you find yourself hiding from God? Jesus is inviting you to come and know him. If that doesn't stir you, remember that he does not say "come" just cone; he repeats it to you. He could not have expressed his invitation more lovingly"(Welch). Do we remember the gospel? Do we remember what we are saved from? Many people believe in heaven, angels, and even God. But what about hell? Do you realize your sins are already paid for in blood? If anything helps you learn the fear of the Lord… what about hell? We can't imagine how horrible hell is going to be. Why are we worrying and scared about the things in this world and not about where we are going to ultimately end up living for eternity? "Do not be afraid of those who kill the body but cannot kill the soul. Rather, be afraid of the One who can destroy both soul and body in hell." -Matthew 10:28 The "one" is satan. John Calvin said that this text makes one's hair stand on end. We need to not be as slow to hate our sin as we are. Who are we living for? We need to remember the gospel, and remember what we were saved from. Read Psalm 8 and Psalm 139. Those helped me a lot. I also want to try and read "The Holiness of God" by R.C. Sproul. I have heard good things about it. I've also been learning about "felt needs" such as biological (food, water, shelter, etc), spiritual, and psychological (love, happiness, acceptance, self-esteem). I need to be more careful about who fills these needs. Either I can look to people, or I can look to Christ. Who is going to be more fulfilling? We as the human race are a needy people. Sin fills our needs with people or objects. Faith fills our needs with Christ. Another thing is that we need to try and define our needs biblically and not use God as a means to attain our needs. I have been horrible at this lately, especially through prayer. You can either pray God's will be done, or that God works in a certain situation to give you the outcome that YOU desire. It is a hard thing to be selfless and really truly put things in God's hands. I'm glad he is able to take all my worry, doubt, and everything else and turn it into something beautiful. I think God has something great for me. I just wish i saw the light at the end of the tunnel. Maybe my life right now is just a big test of faith. But, time doesn't heal things.. God does. April 4, 2006 A friend told me the other day, "I hope I can find someone to love me that much some day". All I can think about that, is I just hope I'm not holding onto something for no reason. Anyways, its pollen-season again. Man, I hate pollen, oh well. We talked about how society today and society for the last 50 years has been maturing in complacency. How we are apathetic towards a lot of today's problems and issues. I would have to agree. What really got me was how we keep relating to documents that aren't absolute truth. People put their lives into the Constitution and it seemed throughout the class we kept referring back to it as if it were some perfect document… but its not. It has revisions and amendments. The only thing I think we should consider in such high regard is the 10 commandments. When was the last time those got modified? We also talked about how economy rules the world and how other problems and issues seem to disappear if there is money in people's pockets. It's true and I wish it wasn't the way it was. But once again, there is no sense trying to make an imperfect world, perfect. Why are so many people these days going through identity crises? That was random I know, but people really need to step back and think about where there life is heading. We also talked about anti-conformity and Pink Floyd's "The Wall". It was an interesting discussion. Short entry today! "Do they not have pen or paper where you are? 'Cause I haven't heard from you in ages. I relive each memory from time to time, read notes exchanged with all those scented pages. It's coming back. It's all coming back to me now. Tell me everything turned out alright, cause I'm where we said that we'd meet tonight. Does he treat you like you want? Does he ask to take your hand? Does he believe in dreams we talked about? When with no music we danced. I thought you said that you'd come find me, I thought you said you'd be home by now. I heard you sang that you'd come back here, so I wrote to remind you somehow. Dance by yourself and think of me when you do. I'm not sure you understand what this means to me… what you do to me. I'm willing to prove that you're the one. I regret to slip away. Now I know it was only you that I've been searching for, been missing all this time. Let the past be past. Let's start today, letters won't do. I need to see your face. Tell me where to meet. I'll tell you why we should be." - Stationary Stationery by Anberlin April 5, 2006 YAWP!!! Ahh what a day. =) I'm starting to try and memorize some good scripture (not that there is bad scripture haha). Today's so far are: "Let the words of my mouth and the meditations on my heart be pleasing in your sight, O Lord, my Rock and my Redeemer." - Psalm 19:14 "The fear of the Lord is pure, lasting forever." - Psalm 19:9 April 6, 2006 Oh, what a tangled web we weave.. April 9, 2006 A week from today is Easter. That is pretty cool. I've been working a lot recently so my entries have been rather short. I've also started a new project a few days ago that will take about two months to complete. I don't know at this point whether it's a good idea or not. Anyways, I watched the movie "Lucky Number Slevin" last night. It was pretty good, just hard to follow until you see the second half of the movie, which basically explains the first half. I've got a paper due Tuesday in my Human Values and Meaning class. We are supposed to address a problem in the community and how we would go about fixing it. I haven't decided which of the many ideas I have I want to write about yet. So yea, basically I haven't started and it's due in two days. I'm sure I'll be fine. I miss New York and camp where I go every year. I'm glad I get to go again soon because all of my fondest memories are there. Well its time to go get some food and then go to the leadership meeting at church at 6. I'll end with a song (of course) and some good verses. "Is There No Truth in Beauty?" By Just Surrender This is how it's been, this is how it will be and when you wake up with him, remember when it was me and I always will be waiting for you and I know that you will never see...that I can't break away from these chains to my heart the further you push me the closer you are maybe I should try to let go maybe I should try to walk away there's nothing left to say Do you remember when, you used to laugh there with me and now I've become the joke, a punchline's all I will be and I always will be waiting for you and I know that you will never see ...that I can't break away from these chains to my heart the further you push me the closer you are maybe I should try to let go maybe I should try to walk away there's nothing left to say Check these out if you have some down time: Galatians 2:20, Colossians 3:3 (the whole book for that matter), 1 Timothy 6:15, Isaiah 46:9, Ephesians 4:22-24, Matthew 20:28, Luke 9:23-25, Philippians 2:3-11. I learned today that the gospel frees us from being sovereign in our lives, frees us to surrender everything in our life to Christ, and frees us to serve others (as well as many others, but this was just today's lesson). Hope everyone is doing well. April 10, 2006 I had an early start to this week and went to Starbucks at 7:30. Came home and wrote a four page paper in under an hour, then went for a nice long bike ride. My legs are screaming and I'm going to be sore tomorrow! Oh well, it's about time I get some exercise. I know I've already made a small entry about the movie "The Da Vinci Code", but I've been studying it more recently and wanted to write about it in more detail. The main claims that the movie make do not in any way reflect or depict the events that true Christians today believe, nor do they reflect at all the stories or beliefs that are stated in the Bible. Some of the main claims the movie and Dan Brown makes are: 1. Jesus is not God. (The church did not recognize Jesus as divine until the fourth century A.D. at the Council of Nicea. Jesus' elevation to divinity was a ploy concocted by Emperor Constantine designed to consolidate his power in the Byzantine Empire). 2. Jesus was married and had a child. (The Church suppressed evidence of Jesus' secret marriage to Mary Magdalene and the birth of their offspring, a daughter named Sarah, in order to cement its own ecclesiastical power. Mary was pregnant at the time of the crucifixion and later moved to France). 3. The Four Gospels are not reliable and were late in being accepted into the Canon. (The four canonical gospels - Matthew, Mark, Luke, and John - were only accepted into the canon in the fourth century A.D. in the place of the earlier and more reliable Gnostic Gospels). Obviously, if you use the Bible as reference: these claims are a bunch of bologna. There are over 500 passage in the Bible that relate Jesus to God (John 8:58, Romans 9:5, Philippians 2:5-7, Hebrews 1:8, etc). Dan Brown uses the logic of saying that if Jesus had not been married, the gospel would have mentioned it. So since they don't, Jesus must have been married. That is crazy. That is merely an attempt to shift the burden of proof. If you ask me, if he WAS married, they would have mentioned it. Also check out Mark 16:1, John 20:13-17, and Matthew 19:12. Lastly, there is no evidence that the Gnostic gospels ever WERE in the Bible, and there is no evidence that proves Matthew, Mark, Luke, and John WEREN'T. Also, the canon wasn't even discussed at the Council of Nicea. There are many other parts to the movie which also are not historically correct and it bothers me that Dan Brown claims in the beginning of the book that "all depictions of artwork, architecture, documents, and secret rituals in this novel are accurate." How can someone make this claim? I've read in the news about the gospel of Judas that depicts Judas not to be a traitor, but rather a hero that freed Jesus by betrayal from his physical body on earth to go to Heaven. First of all, the gospel of Judas isn't a gospel. Second of all, it wasn't even written by Judas. Also, people are trying to use documents such as this one, or the Dead Sea Scrolls to prove certain points about Jesus' life. However, the Dead Sea Scrolls are Jewish documents in the first place. They are also 150 years prior to Jesus. Don't buy into this book's beliefs or the movie either for that matter. It states the belief that truth is relative and subjective, always provisional. "The Da Vinci Code" is based on fiction, not fact. Also, there have also been articles I read about how Jesus didn't really walk on water, simply a patch of ice. Haha! What about the boat the disciples were in? How was it moving thru the water if it was on a patch of ice? Even if what they have been trying to prove WAS true, how do you account for the other hundreds of miracles Jesus performed? The church I attend regularly, Providence Baptist, is hosting a seminar on the movie "The Da Vinci Code" with a guest speaker Dr. Ken Boa, D.Phil., who will examine the claims and evaluate the evidence of the novel and film. There will be Starbucks coffee and refreshments as well. The event is on Friday night, May 12th from 7-9 PM. For directions, visit www.pray.org. If you want to go and need a ride, email me at dweisch@juno.com and I can help set up a ride for you. Or, if you just want to talk about anything I have said, shoot me an email and I would love to talk to you about what you think and why I believe what I believe. A lot of this journal was based off of Andreas J. Kostenberger's presentation "The Da Vinci Code: Is Christianity True". For more information, visit his website at www.biblicalfoundations.org. April 12, 2006 "You Can Close Your Eyes" by James Taylor Well the sun is surely sinking down But the moon is slowly rising So this old world must still be spinning 'round And I still love you It won't be long before another day We gonna have a good time And no one's gonna take that time away You can stay as long as you like So close your eyes You can close your eyes, it's all right I don't know no love songs And I can't sing the blues anymore But I can sing this song And you can sing this song When I'm gone April 14, 2006 In honor of Good Friday and Easter... Mark 15:22-41 The Crucifixion of Jesus And they bring him unto the place Golgotha, which is, being interpreted, The place of a skull. And they gave him to drink wine mingled with myrrh: but he received it not. And when they had crucified him, they parted his garments, casting lots upon them, what every man should take. And it was the third hour, and they crucified him. And the superscription of his accusation was written over, THE KING OF THE JEWS. And with him they crucify two thieves; the one on his right hand, and the other on his left. And the scripture was fulfilled, which saith, And he was numbered with the transgressors. And they that passed by railed on him, wagging their heads, and saying, Ah, thou that destroyest the temple, and buildest it in three days, Save thyself, and come down from the cross. Likewise also the chief priests mocking said among themselves with the scribes, He saved others; himself he cannot save. Let Christ the King of Israel descend now from the cross, that we may see and believe. And they that were crucified with him reviled him. And when the sixth hour was come, there was darkness over the whole land until the ninth hour. And at the ninth hour Jesus cried with a loud voice, saying, Eloi, Eloi, lama sabachthani? which is, being interpreted, My God, my God, why hast thou forsaken me? And some of them that stood by, when they heard it, said, Behold, he calleth Elias. And one ran and filled a spunge full of vinegar, and put it on a reed, and gave him to drink, saying, Let alone; let us see whether Elias will come to take him down. And Jesus cried with a loud voice, and gave up the ghost. And the veil of the temple was rent in twain from the top to the bottom. And when the centurion, which stood over against him, saw that he so cried out, and gave up the ghost, he said, Truly this man was the Son of God. There were also women looking on afar off: among whom was Mary Magdalene, and Mary the mother of James the less and of Joses, and Salome; (Who also, when he was in Galilee, followed him, and ministered unto him;) and many other women which came up with him unto Jerusalem. April 16, 2006 Easter is such an awesome holiday that I think really gets overlooked by the majority of the world. The sufficiency of the scripture and the supremacy of Christ are amazing. Remember, life has no meaning outside itself, without the truth of the resurrection. "He is the image of the invisible God, the firstborn over all creation. For by him all things were created: things in heaven and on earth, visible and invisible, whether thrones or powers or rulers or authorities; all things were created by him and for him. He is before all things, and in him all things hold together. And he is the head of the body, the church; he is the beginning and the firstborn from among the dead, so that in everything he might have the supremacy. For God was pleased to have all his fullness dwell in him, and through him to reconcile to himself all things, whether things on earth or things in heaven, by making peace through his blood, shed on the cross." - Colossians 1:15-20 "Why do you look for the living among the dead? He is not here; He has risen!" -Luke 24:5-6 Other good scripture to think about: Acts 2:32-43 Luke 16:19-31 Isaiah 52:13-53:6 Romans 5:1-10 I Corinthians 15 II Corinthians 5:14-17 Acts 17:24-31 Romans 1:1-4 Colossians 2:8-15 I Peter 1:3-7 Ephesians 1:16-23 April 17, 2006 "Delight yourself in the Lord, and he will give you the desires of your heart." -Psalm 37:4 I've started reading two more books lately: The Sacred Romance by Curtis and Eldredge and When I Don't Desire God by John Piper. School is starting to speed itself up since the end of the semester is coming. I only have 8 or 9 days of class left and only one exam. I haven't decided what my summer is going to look like yet. I could put in a tremendous amount of hours, or I could spend a lot of time on my music again, or I could do summer school. Who knows, probably not the latter. Anyway, the "project" I started lately is going pretty well even though I'm only a small fraction of the way done with it. For some reason yesterday I felt differently about something. I don't know what about or even why or how. It's like I turned over a new leaf, or turned a page in the book of my life story. But in reality nothing is different and nothing has changed. Oh well. "And do not be conformed to this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind, so that you may prove what the will of God is, that which is good and acceptable and perfect." -Romans 12:2 "Let us not become weary in doing good, for at the proper time we will reap a harvest if we do not give up." - Galatians 6:9 "Therefore I tell you, do not worry about your life, what you will eat or drink; or about your body, what you will wear. Is not life more important than food, and the body more important than clothes? Look at the birds of the air; they do not sow or reap or store away in barns, and yet your heavenly Father feeds them. Are you not much more valuable than they? Who of you by worrying can add a single hour to his life? And why do you worry about clothes? See how the lilies of the field grow. They do not labor or spin. Yet I tell you that not even Solomon in all his splendor was dressed like one of these. If that is how God clothes the grass of the field, which is here today and tomorrow is thrown into the fire, will he not much more clothe you, O you of little faith? So do not worry, saying, 'What shall we eat?' or 'What shall we drink?' or 'What shall we wear?' For the pagans run after all these things, and your heavenly Father knows that you need them. But seek first his kingdom and his righteousness, and all these things will be given to you as well. Therefore do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own." - Matthew 6:25-34 Today was interesting. It was warm, it was cold. It was sunny, it was raining. Anyways, those last two verses are what I need to focus on right now and kind of posting them as a reminder to myself. I need to find a better way to have the journal dates section so that its a little easier on the eyes like a calendar or something. Oh well, I'll get it to later hopefully. That's all for today. "If you go, I will wait for you." -This Day and Age April 20, 2006 I finally am finished with my math project. I left early on the day that she assigned partners so I never had any, forcing me to do the whole project on my own. I have a quiz today too so hopefully that will go smoothly. My car has gotten most of the sub-frame straightened out and I've ordered all the parts I'll need. Here is a picture of how the car sits as of today: (link removed) Also, a band I've known for quite some time, Rookie of the Year, has released their new CD and it is available to stream on purevolume.com, so go check it out here: http://www.purevolume.com/rookieoftheyear Bible study last night was really awesome. We started without having a clear goal on where the conversation would go and we steered away from the book discussion after about an hour and started telling stories about what God was doing in each other's lives. It was really and we all indulged in loads of cookie dough! I ended up leaving at around 10:30, I don't ever think its gone that late before. Hopefully I will be posting a few of the lessons I've learned from the book we are studying "When People are BIG and God is small". I've gone through and highlighted some of the important parts that I thought were meaningful to me. So ill try and post those up sometime soon. My older brother is coming home this weekend and I also learned that he will be living here for the summer before he starts trying to look for a job (he just graduated college), so that is neat. Anyway, here are some good quotes to think about: "While we may not be called to martyr our lives, we must martyr our way of life. We must put our selfish ways to death and march to a different beat. Then the world will see Jesus." -Michael Tait "Therefore, since we are surrounded by such a great cloud of witnesses, let us throw off everything that hinders and the sin that so easily entangles and let us run with perseverance the race marked out for us. Let us fix our eyes on Jesus, the author and perfecter of our faith." -Hebrews 12: 1-2a "Your worst days are never so bad that you are beyond the reach of God's grace. And your best days are never so good that you are beyond the need of God's grace." -Jerry Bridges "Humble yourselves before the Lord, and he will lift you up." -James 4:10 April 22, 2006 I never thought running three times around my neighborhood at 10:30 PM in an absolute downpour could be so revitalizing after 14 hours of working. =) April 23, 2006 It's a gorgeous day outside today after all the rain the last few days so I'm making a short post of some notes I took today and thats it. Adios. Leon Tucker 9:30 Service in the DLC The Treasures We Have Discovered (II Corinthians 4:1-18; 5:14-21) 1. The Great News of Christ (II Corinthians 4:4-6; 5:21) A. He is God (v.4) B. He has made Himself known (v.6) C. He is spectacular (v.4,6) D. He has made a way for healing (5:21) 2. We Can Enjoy it Daily (II Corinthians 4:7-9) A. God's power at work in us (v.7) B. God's promises at work in us (v.8-9) 3.We Can Enjoy it for Eternity (II Corinthians 4:16-18) A. It is inspiring (v.16) B. It is lasting (v.17-18) 4. We Can Share it with Others (II Corinthians :14-21) A. Share His friendship (v.14-15) B. Share His truth (v.16-20) Dave Owen 11:10 H20 Service Redefined by the Gospel (part 7) -There is freedom in the Gospel to Fight Injustice. -William Wilberforce (1759-1833). -In fighting injustice there are 3 truths that will sustain you during the fight. 1. Freedom in the gospel trains us to renounce ungodliness and to live self-controlled lives. (Titus 2:11-12, Romans 6) 2. Freedom in the gospel teaches us to wait patiently for the blessed appearing of Christ. (Titus 2:13) 3. Freedom in the gospel trumpets the call to be zealous for good works. (Titus 2:14, Micah 6) "There is pure and undefiled religion in the sight of God". -James 1:27 "For we are his workmanship, created in Christ Jesus in good works, which God prepared beforehand, that we should walk in them". -Ephesians 2:10 In order to fight injustice: -Renounce ungodliness - Be holy. -Make the most of your life here on Earth for God. -Be zealous for gospel centered good works. -Be passionate for the glory of God. April 24, 2006 I apologize for savedalone.com and this journal being temporarily down the last few days. I was exceeding my bandwidth so I upgraded my hosting, and made a new layout for the journal in the process. I think the entry dates and calendar for this layout are a little easier on the eyes than version 1 of the journal that I made when I first started the journal. I guess I kind of started it basic not knowing how much I would write or how much it would be read, but this site is doing great and I've gotten tons of positive feedback. Thanks for everyone's comments and emails. April 25, 2006 Well I've began to read yet another book. This one is called "Captivating" (Unveiling the Mystery of a Woman's Soul) by John and Stasi Eldredge. It's an "OK" book at best.. and really lacks a lot of important biblical information... but tt is really giving me a better insight to what a woman's heart really may look like. I've always thought I understood girls (better than most) but this book is opening my eyes to a lot of things I have really overlooked. Some of the main things I've learned are that women feel unseen, unsought, undesired, or often times "not enough" which leaves them with a sense of shame. They struggle to know if they matter at all. They want to be romanced, feel needed, and play an important irreplaceable role. They desire to be desired and love feeling wanted and fought for. What's amazing to me is that "there is nothing that inspires a man to courage so much as the woman he loves". The desire of a man's heart is to fight for the one he loves. Men long to offer their strength on behalf of a woman. It's amazing how God makes the two desires of both men's and women's hearts come together like two puzzle pieces. I don't know why so many women suffer with self-worth. To me, every girl should be something that is looked upon as beautiful and real. After all, we are made in God's own image… man and female alike. Women are the crown of creation, God's masterpiece, his finishing touch on creation, and a beauty to unveil. Most women just have trouble seeing their inner beauty if you ask me. But this is a beauty that is powerful. It nourishes, comforts, and inspires. To every woman out there that is reading this: "There is a radiance hidden in your heart that the world desperately needs". This has also taught me a whole lot about myself, and a lot about how men feel. They don't ask questions that women ask, but rather questions like, "do I have what it takes?". I often wonder that myself. Do I have what it takes to be the person God created me to be? Am I acting the way I should towards all the different people in my life? I don't want to bore you with all the details about my relationships or of things I have learned, but hopefully I've hit the highlights from the book's first 2 or 3 chapters. Here are some good quotes that I've also taken from the book: "Most women hate their vulnerability. They are not inviting, they are guarded. Most of their energy is spent trying to hide their true selves, and control their worlds to have some sense of security." -Stasi Eldredge "Failure is a man's worst fear." - John Eldredge "No matter how long it takes, no matter how far - I will find you." - Nathaniel to Cora in the Last of the Mohicans "I lift my eyes to the hills, where does my help come from? My help comes from the Lord, the maker of Heaven and Earth." -Psalm 121:1-2 "Every essence of beauty points to eternity." -Hans Urs Von Balthasar "You make me want to be a better man." -Jack Nicholson from As Good as it Gets. April 26, 2006 Work was pretty slow today, it's another rainy day. Last night was pretty amazing though, I love sitting near the window during rain and thunderstorm and just feeling the breeze come in. Tonight is the last night of bible study this semester until the summer. Sad day. Oh well. I have a major math test tomorrow and the last paper due for my ethics class next week and I haven't done any studying and I don't even know what I will write my paper on yet. I should probably get on that. Anyways, I read some more of Captivating, and of course, took some more notes (these are all from chapter 4): "Women dominate and control because they fear their vulnerability." (page 53) "We have never considered that by living a controlling and domineering life, we are really refusing to trust God." (man, that is convicting, page 53) We hide our truest selves and offer only what we believe is wanted, what is safe. We act in self-protective ways and refuse to offer what we truly see, believe, and know. We will not risk rejection or looking like a fool. We hide because we are afraid. To hide means to remain safe, to hurt less. At least that is what we think. And so by hiding, we take matters into our own hands. We don't return to our God with our broken and desperate hearts. And it has never occurred to us that in all our hiding, something precious is also lost - something the world needs from us so very, very much. (page 56) Where do you go instead of to God when the ache of your heart begins to make itself known? When we camp our hearts in self doubt, condemning thoughts, or even shame because those emotions have become familiar and comfortable, we are faithlessly indulging rather than allowing our deep ache to draw us to God. (page 57) Unfortunately, often times these indulgences, no matter what they are seem to work at least for the time being. What is really happening is that sometimes these indulgences will "imprison us in chains that separate us from the heart of God", and even others as well. What always ends up happening in the end is that if you don't fill the void in your heart with God, it will never be full. We need not be ashamed that our hearts ache; that we need and thirst and hunger for much more. All of our hearts ache. All of our hearts are at some level unsatisfied and longing. It is our insatiable need for more that drives us to God. (page 58) "A woman's worse fear is abandonment." Rather than turning back to God, reversing the posture that brought about our crisis in the first place, we continue down that path by doing what we can to secure ourselves in a dangerous and unpredictable world. (page 59) "Whatever is not from faith is sin." - Romans 14:23 April 27, 2006 Work was pretty slow today, it's another rainy day. Last night was pretty amazing though, I love sitting near the window during rain and thunderstorm and just feeling the breeze come in. Tonight is the last night of bible study this semester until the summer. Sad day. Oh well. I have a major math test tomorrow and the last paper due for my ethics class next week and I haven't done any studying and I don't even know what I will write my paper on yet. I should probably get on that. Anyways, I read some more of Captivating, and of course, took some more notes (these are all from chapter 4): "Women dominate and control because they fear their vulnerability." (page 53) "We have never considered that by living a controlling and domineering life, we are really refusing to trust God." (man, that is convicting, page 53) We hide our truest selves and offer only what we believe is wanted, what is safe. We act in self-protective ways and refuse to offer what we truly see, believe, and know. We will not risk rejection or looking like a fool. We hide because we are afraid. To hide means to remain safe, to hurt less. At least that is what we think. And so by hiding, we take matters into our own hands. We don't return to our God with our broken and desperate hearts. And it has never occurred to us that in all our hiding, something precious is also lost - something the world needs from us so very, very much. (page 56) Where do you go instead of to God when the ache of your heart begins to make itself known? When we camp our hearts in self doubt, condemning thoughts, or even shame because those emotions have become familiar and comfortable, we are faithlessly indulging rather than allowing our deep ache to draw us to God. (page 57) Unfortunately, often times these indulgences, no matter what they are seem to work at least for the time being. What is really happening is that sometimes these indulgences will "imprison us in chains that separate us from the heart of God", and even others as well. What always ends up happening in the end is that if you don't fill the void in your heart with God, it will never be full. We need not be ashamed that our hearts ache; that we need and thirst and hunger for much more. All of our hearts ache. All of our hearts are at some level unsatisfied and longing. It is our insatiable need for more that drives us to God. (page 58) "A woman's worse fear is abandonment." Rather than turning back to God, reversing the posture that brought about our crisis in the first place, we continue down that path by doing what we can to secure ourselves in a dangerous and unpredictable world. (page 59) "Whatever is not from faith is sin." - Romans 14:23 April 30, 2006 I've been busy with working overtime at work and also on my car. A little update: my car is back in my garage and I've began to rebuild it. My hands are cut, bruised, and sore. My muscles ache and I'm extremely tired lately. Anyways, I will take a picture of my car when a little bit more work is done on it and post a link for those who want to see how it's coming along. I hope everyone has a happy end-of-the-semester! "And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose." -Romans 8:28